How I Became a Poser

I was a poser for over twenty years.

That was not something most people admitted themselves to be but it was important for me to do.

It was the only way I could change.

But what type of poser am I?

This is a description of my personality when I was posing: Smart. Quiet. Obedient. Hard working.

This is a description of my personality once I dropped the mask and showed who I really was: Quiet. Idiot. Arrogant. Hard working.

At least my work ethic and poor social skills never changed. So yes, my twenties were filled with me pretending to be smarter than I was.

I also hid my overconfidence more back then.

That was something I stopped now.

But why was I posing for so long?

Some could say complancy led to me becoming a poser.

That complancy was rooted in my ego and my comfortableness with my life back then.

If you want to think of it in the vein of worldbuilding, the reason why most empires endure is because the people are either too broken mentally to fight it or comfortable with the benefits disregarding the consequences of it.

The empire of fraudulent behavior I had was never battled by me because I never felt like it was a problem.

A lot of posers are dreamers. They have an intense desire for an ideal or dream life they want.

They want it but they lack the courage or discipline to work towards it.

But to work towards something is hard. That's what scared them, it scared me.

During my twenties, I had dreams that I never worked towards because as soon as it got hard, I quit.

This action of quiting soon becomes a habit.

Habits.

They are the essential building block of a person's personality. A person could easily describe who they are to you but you truly know who they are by what they do, especially frequently.

What they do continuously are their habits, these are the actions they are comfortable with. They have experience with these set of actions and feel best when they are doing them. Even if they change a little later on, their comfort with those habits are like a drug, they might fall back into those bad habits when they are stressed or not feeling much progress in their life.

So that's how it happens.

Let's say you don't want that to happen anymore.

You want to be different.

Being a poser is a part of your behavior which (if this was a novel) constructs your character.

Change begins with a change of mindset and belief.

Why do you have those habits?

Because they are actions you are comfortable with.

Your habits are built from your actions but those actions are decisions.

You know what determines your decisions, your beliefs and mindset.

That is where you start when it comes to change.

What you think.

The best character arcs are built from the internal mental struggle inside all of us.

As far as what I think?

That's a whole different story for another time.

At least you know what makes a person become what they are.

As far as posers, they are common. Some people will always try to pretend to be someone else either to gain attention or to distract away from their inadequacy.

The latter is more forgivable because every society applies pressure on how people should behave.

If you fall short of that behavior, you are criticized, sometimes harshly.

One way would be to accept who you are as unconventional and hold your head up high through the attacks.

But not everyone is that strong mentally, and usually fall in line.

If they can't exactly fall in line, they play the middle ground and become a poser.

In private and amongst close friends, they are their true selves. In the eyes of the public, they are the biggest posers of the socially accepted image that is expected of others.

I think one cultural aspect you can take into consideration when worldbuilding is how posers navigate that world. They will always be people trying to be frauds. What loopholes or exploits does your world have to allow them to fashion their lie?

That is something that makes posers interesting. The world is best told not through the normal conventional character of that world but the fraud or poser that showcases the ills or oppression apparent in it.

So when you build your world ask yourself why is their posing acceptable?

What does it say about that society's values?

Why is it important for people to protect that particular behavioral pattern?

I asked myself that question for so long when I realized I was a poser.

What worried me was why no one said anything.

They only have a problem with me once I dropped the mask and acted in a manner closer to who I really am.

That question is interesting to me and we’re going to find out why.

What behaviors does society pressures you to do?